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cold in the freezer (redo)

with 4 comments

It is a little admitted fact, but capitalism is in fact a technology for the storage of pain. Like a freezer in England, it keep the old stuff cold and below.

What does this mean in practice? It means, for the recently ascendant, that every love comes glanced with a desolate fuck behind the only bar in town, just after closing hour and with the last girl in the room. Every job comes quick with the jobs you shouldn’t ever have, being what you are. It leads to arrogance, which is of course only the flipside of fear, rather than confidence, which only those far removed from the trauma of rising are permitted.

You will always recognise yourself in portraits of fear and disease. You will feel penniless despite your full pockets. You will feel inept despite your great successes. You will write and rewrite and develop elaborate techniques to avoid writing – mainly through recession back into what you essentially are. You will learn how to lie, because that is the only thing that this world has permitted you to do well. It has catered to your lies, at least thus far. When you tell one, it buys you another drink.

You only visited, but you will never truly leave XXX, Ontario – the mill town where you were born and weren’t born at the same time.

As with what’s left in the freezer, you will never be able to forget that there’s perfectly good stuff to eat if you’d only unlaze and thaw it out, cook it up for family dinner. You can order out, but eventually everyone’s going to have to pitch in and cook and eat the stuff that’s kept below.

(Sorry – deleted this one this morning, but now I’ve decided to add it back after just a bit of encouragement to do so. I broke some links and prolly lost pollian’s comments…)

Written by adswithoutproducts

September 5, 2009 at 8:38 pm

Posted in Uncategorized

4 Responses

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  1. It was a brilliant post, best I read in a bit – whatever possessed you to delete it?

    Giovanni

    September 7, 2009 at 1:28 am

  2. Wow.

    Sisyphus

    September 7, 2009 at 6:43 am

  3. Giovanni,

    Well, I enjoy being what I am, which I suppose is some sort of confessional blogger but every once in awhile one cuts oneself slightly too deeply and the worry isn’t so much that that you’ve exposed too much but that you’ve exposed and people won’t get it or like it. So I deleted. And then a few of you expressed disappointment that I did. And so I restored it. That’s the whole story….

    Ads

    September 7, 2009 at 7:52 am

  4. I can see that. I’m noticing that some of the best autobiographical writing on the Web is often accompanied by a pained reluctance, voiced or otherwise. Anyhow, I thought it was lovely and the opening sentence is a cracker, I hope you’ll get to recycle it somewhere. I sure plan to use it.

    Giovanni

    September 7, 2009 at 8:15 am


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