what else, tonight?
After you have finished an overdue article and come home, after the children are asleep and after you downloaded for the older one a new game for your iPhone, after you have heated up a Sainsburys pizza and picked the onions off, after you have written a friend who is suddenly in London and not written another one who will be soon, after you have listened with interest to your wife’s breakdown of a wildly successful misery memoir in which a friend (the one you haven’t written – she was your best female friend not long ago, and you were probably her best male friend before you moved and she moved, ah grad school!) figures as the inflictor of misery, after you have watched a terrible episode of Big Love and checked your blog stats, after you’ve realized that the Yankees aren’t playing tonight and the the Baader-Meinhof movie hasn’t finished downloading, after you waited for things that did not come and read some John Berger, what then?
You go to bed, of course. But before that, what? There is still tonight to be made a decision to send out some poetry, as you found some printed sheets from a few months back that are not bad. What else? A resolution to work at least as hard tomorrow as you did today and to be just as uncomplicated with yourself and with others as you were today and have been for a bit now. What else? You need still to have a recollection that when you were little you said your prayers at night, an Our Father and a Hail Mary at least, and then later ominously, the Act of Contrition was added to the playbill, and nothing (save perhaps booze) has taken the place of that. Perhaps you could take up last minute language study, perhaps you could learn Russian, perhaps there is an iPhone app.